We love that our panties fit all butts: male butts, disabled butts, tiny butts and more. We love all butts, no buts about it! Today at Private Parts, we are discussing being disabled and feeling sexy. We were lucky enough to chat with Terilyn who opened up about her disability and shared some valuable tips on clothing, shopping, sex and more!
Were you born disabled? If not, could you talk about your disability journey?
I wasn’t born disabled, in fact I was dancing for 16 years. I started to experience unexplained weight gain and muscle loss when I went to college. It slowly progressed to chronic pain and muscle weakness. I use a wheelchair outside of my home, although I can walk a short distance. Doctors are still trying to figure out the cause, but in the meantime I am living my best life with what I have!
Walk us through what it’s like to shop for you.
First of all, clothing stores or sections aren’t very wheelchair accessible. I’m constantly worried about accidentally knocking over a display. Also, most stores that carry my size don’t have my size in store, only online. Layer on top the physical challenge of trying things on. I usually end up buying most of my clothes online. My best tip for online shopping is: know your measurements! If you can’t do them yourself ask a seamstress or tailor to do them! Armed with all of your measurements, you can usually compare to size charts. I am typically a size 32 but have worn sizes 28 to a 36. Don’t be embarrassed if you are outside your normal size for a certain store, all stores have different sizing charts!
Where do you usually shop?
A lot of my tops are from Torrid and most of my pants are from Walmart, just because I can try them on and get them locally in several colors. I get bras from a place that makes mastectomy bras. I buy skirts from Darn Good Yarn and all my panties come from Panty Drop!
Let’s talk about confidence. We know that confidence is something that everyone continually works on. Walk me through your confidence journey and how you became more confident.
A lot of my confidence comes from my fashion sense. I have taken the time to find clothes for my favorite fandoms and silly sayings that I love (A lot involving coffee!). I also have a subtle punk rock edge to my style. I cut and dye my hair to feel confident. I get tattoos that mean a lot to me. I went from hating my bigger body and putting work into loving ME. Accepting myself and acknowledging my strengths (and that I’m awesome). I refuse to fit into a mold or box when it comes to plus size fashion and style. I get things altered to my shape and search out those perfect pieces and accessories.
Let’s talk about feeling sexy. What makes you feel sexy?
Honestly, panties! Fun bra designs don’t really exist in a 54 H but nice panties sure do! Even if I am in business attire, my panties make me feel great. During quarantine, I put on makeup and perfume for myself when I am home. I like to put on accessories, do my hair differently each day and try new things to help my confidence.
Is intimacy important to you? Walk through how you’ve dealt with your disability and intimacy.
That one hasn’t been easy but we have worked it out. Lots of pillows help positioning. Learning to speak up made all the difference. If your partner doesn’t know you are uncomfortable, it can’t be fixed. Get creative! Try new things! Grab a pair of leggings and use them to hold a leg in position. Again, LOTS OF PILLOWS. Most of all, laugh at what doesn’t work and keep trying!
What do you wish people knew about people with disability?We exist as normal people! I’m a typical Star Wars nerd. I crochet and work with leather, and am a sucker for Grey’s Anatomy, I’m very intelligent and love to wheel on trails and fish. The wheelchair means nothing. I also LOVE my wheelchair. It gives me freedom to explore the world!
Any advice for other people with disability who want to feel sexy?
Be you! What do you like? What colors do you like? What type of intimacy do you like? Speak up! Demand that your needs be met by your partners. Most of all, remember you are worth it, no matter what your needs. Go buy some pillows 😉